Wednesday, November 05, 2003

My good friend Ryu has agreed to take some time off his vigorous training schedule, which involves climbing cliffs and meditating amongst falling leaves and waterfalls, to sit up there behind my site and look out at visitors with a very very pissed expression. Feel free to *beg for your miserable life* or *point and laugh* before you look at everything else. Ryu doesn't like to be ignored.


Ryu's Bio

Name: Ryu. Just Ryu. (Pronounced 'Roo')
Marital Status: Single
Occupation: No official occupation. As far as most people can tell, he's a hobo.
Hobby: Streetfighting
Likes: Meditating on the true meaning of 'Fight'.
Dislikes: Long-term goals, apparently.

History:
Ryu is the premier karate-man-in-a-karate-gi of fighting games. Ever since his appearance in the groundbreaking, coin-gobbling Streetfighter II, he has been the target of numerous knock-offs, vying for a piece of his glory. Everything the man does has been copied in some form or other by other fighting-game hero wannabes: his clothes, his techniques, even the way he yells his moves everytime he performs them, with total abandon, void of self-consciousness or thoughts of "gee, I must sound silly sometimes".

Because of Ryu, just about every fighting game in existence today has a character that throws a projectile, performs an anti-aerial uppercut, or has a technique that's performed using the ubiquitous forward,down,down-forward joystick motion. Because of Ryu, kids all over the world in the early nineties confused their parents by screaming "Aaaaaare yooou Ken?!" before laying the smackdown on their play buddies, even when said buddies were named Ah Beng or Timothy or something that resembled 'Ken' not in the least. Because of Ryu, the sales of white karate gis goes up any time there's a gamers convention or city parade that gives videogame fans an excuse to get crazy.

But enough about his fans and imitators... what of the man himself? Ryu's personality can be described as quiet, thoughtful, and resolute. It is this last trait that has made him one the greatest fighters, if not the greatest, in videogame history. He is pure, focused, and single-minded in his pursuit to unify his mind, body and technique. He does not fight to win... he fights to understand the true nature of the fight.

The best way to understand Ryu, though, is not by examining his philosphy, but by looking at the company he keeps. To summarize:

Ken: Blonde, American, and decidedly louder than his brother-in-training, Ken had been with Ryu right from the beginning, training under the same master at a secluded dojo in Japan. While Ryu has always been more conserved and strategic in his approach to fighting, Ken has never balked at attacking right from the get-go, and sho-ryu-kenning three times in a row even when there's nobody there to hit. He of the Funky Kicks and the Shin-OhMyLordDidYouSeeThat-Ryuken could always be relied on to keep Ryu or any other opponent on his/her toes with his relentless assault of high-damage combos. He is also filthy rich, being the son of a billionaire. In spite of his millions, however, he has only worn one thing on the battlefield: his tattered red karate gi.

Sakura: A normal, teenage schoolgirl who one day sees Ryu fighting in a duel, Sakura develops an instant crush on our hero and decides to get his attention by... becoming a streetfighter! Donning a headband and focusing her mind, she achieves the impossible, creating her own rough derivations of Ryu's moves with no external help whatsoever, as well as various techniques of her own (many of which, conveniently, allows any onlookers a generous view of her knickers). She now pursues Ryu wherever he goes, hoping one day that he will take her on as his apprentice, if you *wink-wink* know what I mean.

Um, and that's it really. Make of that what you will.



Unnecessary Hypothetical Situation #1
Suppose Ryu met Scooby-Doo and Shaggy and they didn't know who Ryu was. Their conversation might go something like this:

Scooby: Who are roo?
Ryu: That's grammatically incorrect. You should say "Who is Ryu?"
Scooby: Hrrr?
Shaggy: Don't blame him Scoob. He's Japanese, and he's trying to tell us how to speak English! Hey, can you say 'All your base are belong to us?'
Scooby: Ehehehehehehe!
Shaggy: Bwahahahahaha!
Ryu: Shinkuuu..... HADOOOKEN!!!
Scooby and Shaggy: Aiiiiieeeee!!!!!!.............




...And that wraps up our introduction Ryu. Til next time!

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